So, for the last month or so I’ve been seeing a girl. Let’s call her Summer. All in all, she’s been pretty good for me, with a couple of minor exceptions. She’s been a really good reflector of what’s really going on with me and inside me. I’ve noticed how often I overthink my actions. In the name of being ‘considerate’ I end up being insensitive. I’ve become a person that makes excuses instead of opportunities. And somehow or another, I’ve become that “charming” person again. That guy that tries to convince someone that I’m worth the time and effort, but only by showing the parts of myself that I want them to see, instead of all of my person faults and all.

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I feel guilty for caging up Shadow in the downstairs bathroom. We’v only had him for about a year, and he’s got a very interesting dynamic with the family. Basically, he abuses us. Between attacking Trish’s or my feet, or Kailani’s head when she’d lay down on the living room floor to watch TV, or being nearly STRANGLED by Elana, he’s had a secured place in our household. Sure, the contents of his litterbox would rise as if there were yeast in there, and for some reason, he never seemed to have food or water, but we generally took decent care of him. He got cat treats, and actually trained us to provide them for him at need.

Over the last few weeks, Shadow’s been a little… lethargic. Normal for a larger, older cat, but shadow is just hitting a year. He sits on the couch, or under the coffee table, and sleeps. No one is really sure WHAT happened to him. Personally, I think he ate the wrong one of Trish’s plants or something. Now that he’s somehow or another lost general bladder control, it appears to be all downhill from here. When he was sitting with me on the bed, and then peed on my leg, something had to change. So, now we’re waiting to decide what to do. Obviously, the kids aren’t happy about it… at least the ones that can sit up on their own.

“Wax on, wax off”.  This phrase, for people in my generation tends to promote images of a little Japanese guy giving a kid from New Jersey what he asked for, in a roundabout way.  The movie from which the phrase comes, “The Karate Kid”, which I managed to catch on TV over the weekend, and growing up was one of my favorites.  Watching it again as an adult, and a parent, I realized one thing, he played an effective role as a father figure for Daniel Larusso.  Maybe I recognized this now, because I get to experience first hand, a child’s refusal to learn by conventional means.

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